Revolutionary Road

Rating:	★★★★★
Category:	Movies
Genre:	Drama

I don't know anything about the 50s except that it's very different from today. This movie is very, very well made. It's very honest and it made me sad. Leonardo and Kate are just awesome. Watch the final scene. Really very clever.

so i may find (and capture) beauty in unexpected places*

Last night, after months of toying with the idea, I finally gave in. Even if Mercury is still in retrograde, I asked my husband to take out his card and kaskas it for me. (I leave my card stash at home to minimize unnecessary purchases. That is the only strategy that works for me. Haha.)

The kaskas is for this baby:

We found a pretty good deal. I got two 8GB SD cards, a dry box, a tripod, two camera bags (one for Ate Laddie) and an extra battery pack. It's covered by the warranty for a year so to hell with Mercury retrograde. Haha.

I have yet to take it out of its box but I will. Soon.

_____
*inspired by Chico Garcia

trip planner

I'm planning a trip to (somewhere I can't say yet) and just noticed it's almost 4PM. Time passes by quickly talaga if you love what you're doing.

Planning trips is one of the things I love doing the most. I love doing it so much I wish I could turn it into a career.

Hmm, why not?

I really love everything about travel and tourism so maybe I should consider a career shift. I am in the travel industry now but what I'm doing (writing about hotels) is quite not what I really want to do. It's close and I like it but it's still not quite it.

Hehe. Obvious ba? I'm researching about (somewhere I can't say yet) instead of working.

investing in a bag?

In between current issues of O, Simply Her, Reader's Digest and InStyle, I'm also reading The One Hundred: A Guide to the Pieces Every Stylish Woman Must Own by Nina Garcia (yes, borrowed from the library). I'm teaching myself the way of the fashionista, haha.

I love that Nina recognizes the fact that every woman is different and each of us have different needs. In her own words:

There is no ultimate list, as it would go against the very nature of fashion and style, and the frenetic rebelliousness inherent in a truly stylish woman walking down the street wearing that perfectly unexpected mix of color and fabric. Style is dangerously unpredictable.

The One Hundred is just a guide and it's up to the reader to pick the pieces she thinks she needs and make them her own. The book is really a fabulous starting point for women (especially to clueless fashion novices like me) who want to begin building or rebuilding a closet-full of classics.

I'm really learning a lot of interesting stuff along the way. One item that caught my interest is the Investment Bag. I used to think all expensive bags are investment bags, but Nina only named four (yes, four!) bags that will never ever go out of style. These are the bags your grand daughter will want to inherit/steal from you:

1. Chanel 2.55
Why 2.55? Because it was created by Madame Chanel in February 1955. She designed it because she wanted to free up her hands! Each part of the bag says something about its creator. The burgundy lining stands for the uniforms at the convent where she grew up, while the zippered pocket inside the front flap is where she kept her love letters! But I don't think I'm a 2.55 kind of girl. I find it too pretty. Here is the classic in black, an extra large version in red, and an SS09 release in pink:

2. Louis Vuitton Speedy
Of the four, this is the one I'm most likely to buy, if ever I get to that point. If I do make that trip to an LV store and decide to spend my hard-earned moolah on one, I'll probably get a Speedy 30 in Monogram Canvas, Monogram Mini Lin (cotton and linen canvas in ebony or dune) or Epi Leather. The Speedy Epi Leather in cassis and ivory are just gorgeous!
3. Gucci Jackie O or Bouvier
This bag came into the spotlight when then US first lady Jackie Bouvier was photographed with one on her shoulder. The bag was renamed Jackie O because women always looked for and wanted the bag Jackie O had. Now it's called the Bouvier. I'd probably consider this model too, maybe in black GG canvas or python leather:

By the way, girls here adore Gucci bags. Parang wala lang, they can afford Gucci. When you pass by a Gucci store, parang nasa Charles & Keith ka lang sa dami ng tao!

4. Hermes Birkin
If you're not a big celeb or a socialite, then you'd have to wait two years just to get your hands on one of these. Birkins are handcrafted and ranges from USD7,500 and above, depending on the material used, which can either be crocodile, goat or ostrich skin. Birkins also come in a range of colors. I love these, as sported by Lindsay Lohan, Heidi Klum and Victoria Beckham:

I still don't feel like giving in to buying any one of these pieces. These bags are bloody expensive! Right now, travel is my only luxury but maybe I'll consider investing in a pricey bag when I'm 40 or 50. Or maybe never.

Unless I find a benefactor a la Chuvaness or we win the lotto. 

something for the weekend

Sometimes, the only thing you know for certain is what you don't want. Yet often, Kat, that's enough to go on.

10-4 Good buddy,
The Universe

PS
Life is easy, Kat.

no such thing as a bad trip

Any trip can be fraught with disappointment: Expectations are always high, and anything can go wrong. Here are a few suggestions for both first-time and inveterate travelers: More important than packing a bag full of money, pack a bag full of patience and curiosity; allow yourself--encourage yourself--to be sidetracked and to get lost. There's no such thing as a bad trip, just good travel stories to tell back home. Always travel with a smile and remember that you're the one with the strange customs visiting someone else's country. Relying on the kindness of strangers isn't naive--there are good people wherever you go. And, finally, the more time you spend coming to understand the way of others, the more you'll understand yourself. The journey abroad reflects the one within--the most unknown and foreign and unmapped landscape of them all, the ulitma terra incognita. As Mr. Twain said, "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."

--Patricia Schultz, 1,000 Places To See Before You Die: A Traveler's Life List

self-talk

No matter how happy we are and how perfect our life may seem, there are just days when things are a bit off and we lose sight of what is important and great in our lives. I've had a lot of those days and yesterday and the day before and the day before the day before yesterday, were among those when I felt nothing was going right and I was anxious and pressured and stressed.

So this morning when I got to work, I decided that I wanted today to  be different. I realized that nobody else can "fix" the things going on in my mind except me. I sat down and gave myself a talking-to via a very honest journal entry. It's amazing how writing down everything that was bothering me freed me from all of it. After I ended the entry, I felt lighter, more free, peaceful, happy.

On a pink Post-it, I wrote myself a note. It's sort of a door I can get out of in case stressful situations arise, a drug my crazy self can take so she can become lucid again. The note only contains four small words, but has a huge, huge impact on my disposition:

I AM HERE NOW.

I wrote it so I'll always remember that this moment is all I got and I should be here, present and aware. It's so easy to get caught up in life's should be's and what if's that I lose sight of what's right before me. I've got plenty to be thankful for so complaining about a thing or two about what I perceive I lack or not going right in my life is such a waste of energy and just plain unnecessary!

Woah!

All is good great!

Namaste. 

--

I AM HERE NOW.

I've got to keep remembering this.

I feel the world is spinning at warp speed again lately. I haven't been focusing on the "present" as much as I should that's why I've been feeling pressured and stressed again. Maybe my hormones are going crazy or maybe, it's me who's going crazy. I've been really bothered by a couple of things:

- My mom's condition. I try not to worry because it is just a waste of energy, but I can't help it sometimes. I always pray for her and the outcome of the biopsy though. Whatever happens is beyond our control but I really, really hope everything will be fine.

- Babies. Babies are invading my brain! I feel that everyone's getting pregnant except us. But of course that's an exaggeration. Not everyone is pregnant, but a lot of our friends either are pregnant or just had a baby. Yen and Julius. Christine and Marjon. Denice and Mike. On  good days, I think Reden and I are just not ready yet and God is just delaying giving us a child. On bad days, I think something's wrong with us, and on really bad days, I get anxious thinking that maybe we are not cut out to be parents - at all.

I know I shouldn't worry and should get a hold of myself. I'm just feeling pressured to conform to tradition: after marrying, you should have a child. I feel that if we don't, then we're going to  be miserable our whole lives, when that is not actually the case. We've got plenty to do if our marriage doesn't "bear fruit", plus, we could always adopt if we're really up to the challenge of raising a child. Again, I should get a hold of myself. God has plans and I should'nt jump to conclusions. All we can do is what we can do NOW. Beyond that is God's territory.

But!!! I really envy those who are going to be moms, or are moms. Having a child just opens up this other dimension in a couple and introduces them to another version of them, which is being parents. I just think that is awesome and I fervently pray that we get to experience that.

God, kayo na ang bahala.

- My job. Writing marketing copy for our promotions have been enjoyable. Now we're back to writing descriptions for hotels and I'm just B-O-R-E-D. I know it becomes what I think it is so maybe I should just try harder to find something likable (or even lovable) about what I'm doing NOW. However, I should probably keep an eye on opportunities too. What I do everyday just has too big an impact on my disposition so I don't think settling for something I don't have genuine interest in is not the best option. I feel I won't find the job though until I am sure of what I really would love to do on a daily basis for years to come. Or maybe such a job doesn't exist. Maybe we naturally change interests and passions in the course of our lives. Maybe what works now won't necessarily work later and I should cut myself some slack in finding my "life's work."

Whatever. What I am sure of today is that I want to be a mother. Which brings us back to issue number 2. Hayy!

I know, I know. There are things that are bigger than me right now (and always) and I should just focus on what I HAVE instead of what I don't. There are plenty to be thankful for, like:

- My loving and supportive husband, Reden;
- My perfectly functioning body;
- Our capacity to travel (which we probably won't be able to do much of once we have kids);
- My dad who is taking care of my mom

The list could go on. My life isn't really that bad. Actually, it's not bad at all. All is good so I can't understand why the heck I'm ranting about two or three things in my life!

I AM HERE NOW.

ALL IS GOOD.

Gotta remember these more often.

--

Mommy underwent hysterectomy yesterday. Thank God the operation went well.

When I first heard about her condition last Sunday (Mother's Day), I broke down as I tried to make sense of it. I am glad I am with Reden when I heard. He immediately went to my side and comforted me. I am lucky and blessed to have such a sensitive and loving husband.

I pray that my mom will recover quickly and that the result of the biopsy will be negative of malignancy. I pray that whatever happens, we will be able to face it together as a family. Please bless us God.

--

I'm back in the office and I'm not at all thrilled. This is the last place I actually want to be right now. I like what I do but I just don't feel connected to anybody here. Everyone's just typing their lives away.

I wish an opportunity will come up. I really, really want to move on.

--

I wish you were more human, like the one who left. I tell you my mom just had a hysterectomy and all you can say is ok?